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There really aren't enough men. Photo via Flickr user krystian. We all have that friend: Every guy she goes out with is an asshole; she consistently dates "below" her league, and she's on the verge of giving up on a committed relationship altogether.

Not long after he turned 30, the writer Jon Birger realized he greek dating websites his wife knew a lot of women like. The couple didn't have a lot of single male friends left, are there any real single mature women left the many single women they knew all seemed to be buyers stuck in a seller's market. One of those friends, Birger told me, "had been dating a guy for a couple years. It certainly seemed like they were well on their way to getting married.

She was in her late 30s, he was in his mid 40s.

She really wants to have kids, get married, the whole [thing]. And she's amazing in every way. One day at lunch, Birger casually asked her about her boyfriend. They had just broken up. This got Birger, a former economics writer for Fortune and Moneythinking: How could a man of that age be so cavalier about casting aside such an amazing woman?

And why do we all have similar stories of incredible female friends trapped for years in dating hell? Why are there so many great single women? Where are all the great single men?

Fellas, if you're in your 50s, single and dating (and feeling like you're “Online daters, especially the older ones, are like kids in a candy store. The couple didn't have a lot of single male friends left, but the many single For every four college-educated women in my generation, there are three So educational intermarriage—I don't know if that's a real term, . mature at a faster rate than boys' brains, girls mature [faster] socially and intellectually. But remaining alone after the loss of a partner or a bruising divorce is even worse . Women should 'spruce themselves up' if they really want a date Credit: Rex During her seminar, all the old hunting ground clichés crop up.

Using his background in economics and statistics, Birger sought out an answer. The result is his recent book, Date-onomics: There simply aren't enough college-educated men to go. For every four college-educated women in my generation, there are three college-educated men. The result? What Birger calls a "musical chairs" of the heart: As the men pair off with partners, unpartnered straight women are left adult wants casual sex MO West plains 65775 fewer and fewer options—and millions of them are eventually left with no options at all.

I sat down for a long talk with Birger and found out why boys aren't graduating from are there any real single mature women left, why your best friend is single, and why more women should consider moving to Silicon Are there any real single mature women left.

How did you determine that there was this nation-wide "man deficit" among the college-educated? Jon Birger: I think when I began the research, I actually thought the conclusion was a little different. I assumed this was a New York problem or a big city thing. Like in New York, I [thought] it had something to do with the labor market here; fashion and PR and media attract a lot of women and Wall Street isn't nearly the all-male bash that it used to be, so I figured there would be all those shifts in the labor market—[I thought] maybe there was something unique about LA and Washington and New York that make them particularly bad for women.

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Tgere turns out I was wrong. In fact, what I call the "college man deficit" is worse in sinyle states like Montana and West Virginia and Mississippi than it is in California and New York. It's a nationwide are there any real single mature women left. So, where are all the men? I mean they exist, they're just not going to that girl rocks in Greensboro college. This isn't China or India where they have a man-made gender imbalance because of all sorts of horrendous things.

Last year about 35 percent more women than men graduated from college. That's huge! The Department of Education projects that by the class ofthere will be 47 percent more women than men [graduating from college].

That's three women for every two men, essentially. Obviously, none of this would matter if we were all a little more open-minded about who we are willing to date and marry. But there have been multiple studies on this and it turns out Americans have become less likely, over the past 50 years, to marry and date across educational lines.

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So educational intermarriage—I kature know if that's a real term, maybe I just made it up—is at its lowest rate in 50 years. Does that mean in the working-class dating market there are a lot of single men? What implications does that have?

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Among non-college-educated singles ages 22 to woen, there are 9. And deal you look at the women in that age group who are non-college-educated, something like 30 percent of the women are married but only 22 percent of the men are married. It's totally unfair, and I get. The other interesting thing—and you see this in China too—if you look at census data on fully-employed, non-college-educated men age 25 to 30, the ones who are married earn 20 percent more than the ones who are not married.

Which tells me that in order to get married and attract a wife, you have are there any real single mature women left earn more and be more entrepreneurial and work harder.

Is there also an issue for American women where the more educated you are, the smaller your dating pool becomes? It feels that the smarter you are as a woman, the smaller your dating pool is, because women seem less likely to date men less intelligent than themselves.

It's not just women, both men and women are unlikely to date and marry across those lines. It man seeking woman good time possible more doesn't matter for the men because are there any real single mature women left pool of educated women is so vast that their own classism doesn't really punish.

But being unwilling to consider working-class guys affects women in ways that it doesn't affect men. It's totally unfair, and I get that, but it's not like only the women are choosy and the men are all open-minded.

Fair. What are some of the things women can do to increase their likelihood of finding a partner, other than considering working-class guys? I mean, are there "women deserts" they can go to?

How old are you? I'm So what I'm about to say is easier advice for womwn who's 23 or What I'm about to tell you adult exotic cakes probably not workable for a year-old with a whole life here in New York, a family, a womfn It's not an absolute, are there any real single mature women left as you go from the East coast to the West Coast, the ratios among college grads get a little better.

There are certain pockets.

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Even with the gay population, San Francisco is still far better. So if you're just starting out—I'm not saying you're going to base your whole beautiful older woman searching flirt Albuquerque New Mexico around Finding a man, yeah.

But if you're really marriage-oriented and this is a high priority for you and you have geographical flexibility, you just might want to put this on your list, you know. Where are the men? Photo via Flickr user nathaninsandiego. That's really are there any real single mature women left because it also speaks to tech's problem as a very, very male-dominated industry Back East, the sngle with the best ssingle ratio is probably Columbus, Ohio, which has a real burgeoning tech community.

I'm making a quantitative argument not a qualitative argument.

I don't know if these [tech] guys are good guys or whether—I don't know if they can carry on a conversation or not. They can't.

Are there any real single mature women left

I'm just telling you by the numbers I think they're less likely to act like dickheads because they don't have the same kind of leverage. Obviously, if we'd had this conversation 40 years ago, this conversation would have looked different.

There would have been a lot more [college-educated] men than women. Once upon a time, colleges were discriminating blatantly against female applicants, thinking they only went to college to get their Mrs. High schools did a particularly wretched job when it came to teaching girls in math and sciences. So there are a whole host of reasons why girls underperformed in high school and were sing,e against when it came to college applications, but Title IX leveled the playing field.

But I'm reluctant to entirely credit Title IX because women started attending college in other countries, where there was no Title IX, and the gains remained around the same time. So the question is, if it's not Title IX what is it? Claudia Golden, who is an economist at Harvard, her conclusion is that it's the [birth-control] pill. Her argument is that the big driver of gains in female college are there any real single mature women left is the expectation of workforce participation.

If you're getting lonely lady looking casual sex Newton at 21 or 22 and having kids soon thereafter, the payoff of going to college are there any real single mature women left very small. If you can plan your life with greater certainty and delay marriage and childbirth, the investment value of college goes up.

So she credits the pill. And my argument is that the old discrimination [against women] obscured a fundamental biological truth: Girls' brains mature at a faster rate than boys' are there any real single mature women left, girls mature [faster] socially and intellectually. They're about a year ahead of boys. When it comes to actual schoolwork, girls do their homework singoe, girls are more organized, they're less likely to be diagnosed with ADHD, they don't get put in jail [at the same rates].

So I think girls have a developmental advantage when maure comes to college preparation. So mature black female looking for Birmingham guy the rates we're going, is there going to have to be affirmative action for boys, to keep things even?

Lefft lot of elite anj colleges are already engaging in quiet, de-facto, lefr affirmative action for boys. I went to Brown. The acceptance rate for boys is 11 percent; for aingle it's 7 percent.